Mr. Ferdinand's Fate

Chapter 4: The Acrostic Form

 

A few minutes later, Lady Dumphries said, "But who in the world is T.F., and why is he greeting us?"

Lady Helen said, "I suppose the F. stands for Ferdinand?"

Constable Eddings said, "That seems likely. What was Mr. Ferdinand's first name?"

"Albert."

"Perhaps he had a middle name."

"Servants don't have middle names, silly."

"Quite right, quite right."

"Can I see the poem?"

"I don't think it's fit for the eyes of a Lady."

"Please, I've been on the grounds of Eton College, let me see it."

Constable Eddings reluctantly handed the sheet to Lady Helen. Lady Margaret craned her neck over impolitely. She said, "But...."

Lady Helen blushed as she read. "Oh my! Yes I see it: G-R-E-E-T-I-N-G-F-R-O-M-T-F. 'Bust my nut,' what a curious phrase."

Lady Margaret said, "It means, 'to germinate'. I was thinking of an acrown."

Lady Dumphries said, "What?"

"I wrote this poem, not Mr. Ferdinand."

"Good heavens!"

"It's a nature poem."

"I'll say it's natural!"

Constable Eddings said, "A bit of a red herring, I suppose. Here we were, all thinking ... whatever we were thinking. But why did you employ the acrostic?"

"I didn't employ any acrostic. I've never heard of such a thing before."

"A double red herring!"

Lord Dumphries said, "But still, it's rather unusual for something like that to slip into a poem. You're certain you didn't put it there?"

Lady Margaret said, "Quite certain."

Constable Eddings went to the window so momentously that everyone fell silent and watched. He said, "I believe I know someone in London who could help here. Someone with a grasp of the ... paranormal."

Lady Dumpries said, "What's that?"

"It might be the key to what's going on here. Why the death of two Ferdinands? From whence came the, ah, what was it again?"

"The double-u-tee-ef."

"Yes. And how did this message get into this poem? I think I should be going. I'll send my friend a telegram, and he should be here tomorrow."

Lord Dumphries escorted him to the door. "So, back tomorrow?"

"I believe so. I have examined the body thoroughly. You may dispose of it now."

"Thank you, that's just what we'll do. He may have family somewhere."

"Other than continental nobility."

"Yes, ha-ha. In any case, we should hurry on this, I believe. The war is going to start quite soon, and then we'll all have to concentrate on defeating Hitler!"